Loris Z.com

I was looking for something horrific to celebrate my post number 666, but it has already passed without me noticing.

(this is post 670)

Checking Apocalinks, I end up reading this: 100 Greatest Quotes from fundamentalist christian chat rooms.

I intended to quote just one. But there are too many of them, way too many.

Here are some of them. Beware, you will laugh, you will scream, you will feel sick.

Here’s a funny one:

If the Bible is wrong when it tells us it is infallible, then it contradicts itself. If it contradicts itself, then it is unreliable. If it is unreliable, then our faith is totally shattered and Christianity is a lie. You need to seriously reconsider your logic.

And another funny one:

Gravity: Doesn’t exist. If items of mass had any impact of others, then mountains should have people orbiting them. Or the space shuttle in space should have the astronauts orbiting it. Of course, that’s just the tip of the gravity myth. Think about it. Scientists want us to believe that the sun has a gravitation pull strong enough to keep a planet like neptune or pluto in orbit, but then it’s not strong enough to keep the moon in orbit? Why is that? What I believe is going on here is this: These objects in space have yet to receive mans touch, and thus have no sin to weigh them down. This isn’t the case for earth, where we see the impact of transfered sin to material objects. The more sin, the heavier something is.

This one is… almost cute, I’d say:

I am a bit troubled. I believe my son has a girlfriend, because she left a dirty magazine with men in it under his bed. My son is only 16 and I really don’t think he’s ready to date yet. What’s worse is that he’s sneaking some girl to his room behind my back. I need help, God! I want my son to stop being so secretive!

This one is GOLDEN:

[Replying to ‘as for not seeing evolution it takes several million years… incase you missed that memo…’]
several million years for a monkey to turn into a man. oh wait thats right. monkeys dont live several million years.

This one is fucking scary:

A man can have sexual pleasure from a child as young as a baby. However he should not penetrate, sodomising the child is OK. If the man penetrates and damages the child then he should be responsible for her subsistence all her life. This girl, however does not count as one of his four permanent wives. The man will not be eligible to marry the girl’s sister.

And I want to punch this one:

[about a girl being born with mental disabilities]
This girl is like a leper so what she needs to do is try and find god
if she really believes she can be healed from this state, she will be healed from this state
Most afflictions like this are caused by sins committed while still inside the womb. If she can repent for what she does god will embrace her and make her as human as you or me but if she chooses not to she’ll always be like this

god tests every one of us [emphasis added]

I’ll go eat something, before I throw up.